Transmissions From Closed Society: Khazana

The following was written by a young woman from Tunisia.  We'll call her Khazana. She is 28 years old.

I Want To Live: from Khazana in Tunisia

I am a woman, an Arabic atheist from Tunisia; do you know what it means to be an atheist in a country where 99% are Muslims?  It means you must keep your atheism to yourself and try not to reveal yourself to people around you. It means your life might be threatened at any time.  Your life is less valuable here because in my country being an atheist means you are a sinful person.  You are guilty. You are wrong.  For this you will be rejected, dissed or killed.

I am thankful for science and reason for opening my eyes to the truth. I am not a slave to illusions and lies anymore. I don’t believe in supernatural beings and I don't wish to be subject to morality based on outmoded religious beliefs.  I am capable of making up my own mind.  The people around me cannot find out that I have stopped believing.

I am 28 years old and I am desperate to have a relationship with some like-minded people. How can I get along with people if I don’t share the same beliefs and mentality!? I can’t be in a romantic relationship with men who might abuse me if they discover my secret.  I am afraid I will be forced to marry and obey a man that will treat me as if I am not an independent adult human worthy of dignity. I do not wish to live a secret life where I pretend to be religious and perform 5 prayers per day with a scarf on my head.

I would like to leave Tunisia, but it is hard to find a job.  I could not afford a plane ticket.  I am stuck here with no one to talk to, no one to listen.  It is just me, helpless and alone in the dark.

I am not the only one who is struggling. The unemployment rate among women is 41.1% and the unemployment rate among men is 21.4%.  I have spent 3 years trying and failing to find a job.

There is no future for me here. I am done with my situation I want to have a life.  I want to experience freedom. I want a job that makes me feel like a human. I want the opportunity to have an impact on society. I want rights. I want to defend those rights. I want TO LIVE!

Khazana,
Tunisia